Don’t it always seem to go
That you don’t know what you got ’til it’s gone – Joni Mitchell
Just got back in from shoveling and snow blowing outside to write this. The Nor’easter wind was blowing the damn snow into my face while I was trying to remove it from my driveway, so I started thinking about something more pleasant … my photography!
But then, as a fresh gust blanked me, I remembered that I’ve been without access to my darkroom now for over a month or so because of my basement-finishing project. Not only has my darkroom been turned into a storage space, it is all but barricaded $#@%^&*! And before that it was in a discombobulated state, due to construction of extensions to my enlarging bench to accommodate the Leitz Focomat 1C and Leitz Focmat 2C that now reside next to my Devere 504.
And sitting on top of the baseboard of the Devere are about fifteen rolls of film that need to be developed @#!$$T%Y^!
As I’ve been pounding nails into countless two by fours or cutting wood with my friend on the table saw (I’m really just his glorified helper to be completely honest), I think more about my darkroom and the time I’ve lost for making photographs than the beautiful dedicated listening room I will have in the hopefully not to distant future. And I’m sure I will be thinking about this even more while I am putting up all that drywall and painting!
I miss it all, but what if it was taken away for good? One of my friends around the corner just finished recovering from the Omicron variant. Fully vaccinated and boosted and still got the damn virus! It wasn’t terrible except that he lost his hearing. Problem is that he’s a musician. We talked about it and what it could mean for him. Thankfully after seeing a specialist who proscribed something all is well and he can hear just fine!
That hit me awful hard. What if I lost my hearing? Then I couldn’t listen to my wonderful stereo and my vinyl collection of 4,000 or so records (I know, I know!) in my beautiful listening room I spent all this time and money building. And what if I lost my vision … my mother had macular degeneration so I think about this from time to time … or couldn’t walk … I was in a nasty car accident about five years ago and still suffer from its outcome … what would happen to my photographic life I love so much?
Every time I begin to take things for granted I stop and think about just how lucky I am. It’s a gift and I thank my lucky stars for it everyday. After all, it could all be completely different … a lot different.
Sometimes I wish I didn’t think about these things so much, but I’m glad I do, because you don’t know what you got ’til it’s gone!
Get out there, have fun, be creative and live the dream.
Stay safe,
Michael